Dating again after heartbreak

We all know it can be hard getting over a failed relationship, and we all deal with it differently. Some like to spend time alone, learning from what went wrong and enjoying being single, while others are keen to move on to the next relationship. This article offers advice for those getting over a relationship and starting to think about a new one.  

Value your good points and work on the rest

 It’s easy to feel bad about yourself after a relationship ends. You might focus on the negatives and obsess over your little faults. Before you can start a new relationship, you need to learn to love yourself again.   Relish your positive attributes and remember all of the ways you have helped family and friends. Take action to improve the aspects of your behaviour or personality that you would like to change for the better.

Remove the rose-tinted glasses

 Once a relationship has ended, it’s common to only remember the good times and forget about the bad. While it’s a good idea to let go of bitterness and anger, it’s not advisable to place your ex on a pedestal. It will be very hard for anyone else to live up to that image.   Recall the positive and the negative aspects of your former partner to get a realistic perspective on why the relationship went wrong. Accept that it will take time to form such a strong bond again, but be confident that you will!  

Learn from positive relationships

 While some have a rose-tinted view of their ex, others might be so hurt by a betrayal that it is difficult to imagine a new partner could be any better. For whatever reason, your romantic relationship didn’t work. That doesn’t mean that every relationship will fail.   Just think of all of the positive relationships you have in your life with friends, family and work colleagues. There are lots of people who you love and respect. Focus on their good points and remain optimistic that you will meet a great person like them to share your life with.  

Join a club to meet like-minded people

 Once you’re ready to meet someone new, the question then arises ‘how?’ One way to ease yourself back in to being sociable with new people is to join a club. You could sign up to a gym or take an evening class.   You’ll be more likely to meet someone with the shared interests. It is also a non-pressured environment where you can get to know potential partners as friends first.

Head online to find compatible matches

It can be daunting to get back on the dating scene. That’s why so many people turn to online dating sites like www.eharmony.co.uk.   You will be matched with a compatible fellow singleton, giving you the best chance of finding love again. Whether you want to start dating Birmingham singles or Londoners looking for love, you’ll find them through online dating agencies.

   

Resource Box

Relationship advice
The Telegraph’s tips for a happy relationship.

Dating
The Guardian’s articles about dating.

Love poems
The BBC’s selection of poems about relationships.